Questions have been coming to me about why and how I have such a no BS approach to what I share here. It was a gradual change, but I can tell you where it started. It began because of William, a colleague of mine at a bank some years ago.

A Friendly Face: Remembering William

When I passed William (not his real name) in the hallway, he was the friendliest, most chill person around. Always smiling and telling me to bring any work I needed help with to him or asking me to schedule a lunch. A short, two-minute interaction with him would have me feeling good for the rest of the day. Our design org was very siloed, and I rarely saw or heard from him. So I didn’t really notice when I stopped seeing him altogether.

The Harsh Reality

I don’t know how much time passed, but it was probably a few weeks. One day an email came through that had the subject *paraphrasing, “More information about William”. Glancing through the email came with the realization: 

William had died. 

Not only had he died…he died at work. At his desk. After hours. Working overtime. Alone. I can think of some pretty awful ways to die. Being alone at work is easily top 5.

What I Missed and What I Learned

I reached back into my memory for what I missed. I remembered seeing things but paid no attention to them. William’s face was a bit sunken, but there was no way I’d have known him to be any different. I clearly remembered his clothes. They didn’t fit well. William wore suits every day (we didn’t have to), and his were noticeably too big. I noticed but thought nothing of it.

Here’s the key thing: the email didn’t come from corporate. It came from a colleague who found out and went out of her way to get information and share with the local team, even getting in touch with William’s family. The company never said anything to us about it. Not a single word. Ever.

The Impact on My Outlook and Advice

A lot of naiveté was slapped out of my system that day. I finally understood why when I logged into my work computer, my username wasn’t Corey, rather a collection of random numbers. So why do I teach students to get jobs but also make sure they are committing to themselves above all else? Why I say don’t give more to your employer than you are contractually obligated to? Why I say kill the phrases “dream job” and “dream company”? Why I shake my head at people who post on LinkedIn after just being laid off, to thank the company that just fired them and took away 100% of their livelihood? Why I give people the most direct answers to what they’re looking for? Why I convey my ideas from an objective view without holding back, all while giving as few fucks as humanly possible? 

This is why. Because my job isn’t performing brain surgery on little kids. Even if it was, I’m still the same number to the company.

And I never had that lunch with William.